YAY for us!!
Before I got married I used to romanticized about it.
My marriage was going to be just like a fairy tale. Our love would be effortless and our lives would always be filled with romance, chirping birds and never any unhappy endings.
But here’s the reality….
Marriage is not a fairy tale. Marriage is hard word. Having a good marriage is even harder work.
Did The Hubs and I really know what we were getting into when we walked down the aisle 10 years ago?
Sorta, but not really.
We quickly learned that in marriage there is a lot of sacrifice and compromise that is required of both people in order for the whole “til death do you part” thing to work out.
In the beginning there was just the two of us and well and the dog. We had lots of time to focus on “us” as a couple. We learned a lot about each other those first few years. We used to spend a lot of time talking about our dreams, our expectations and what we wanted our life to be.
Looking back now, it was truly a luxury to have that time alone, together and build the foundation of our marriage.
It wasn’t too long after when our “life” actually started happening – and at a frenetic pace.
Kids, homes, cars, trips, family, careers and finances all became recurring conversation topics. We are stressed, tired and feel like we are being pulled in a million different directions…usually apart from each other. We’re so busy taking care of “us” as a family that we sometimes forget “us” as a couple.
Yes, we argue and we do snap and snipe at each other. It’s only natural. But we always find a way to re-connect and bring us back to what initially brought us together in the first place. It’s being able to remember the love and respect we had for each other which made us want to get married in the first place…
A good marriage is not something that just happens. It is something that is created and nurtured over time. In a marriage it’s the little things that are the big things. It’s about speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating our gratitude on a regular basis.
Marriage isn’t about winning. It’s about lasting. It’s about having the capacity to not only forgive but also to forget and move on. It’s about having a safe place for each person to grow and discover who they are. It’s about remembering to say “I love you” and truly meaning it.
Over the past 10 years The Hubs and I are fortunate to have had more ups than downs, more happiness than sadness, more laughter than tears. We have two sweet kidlets, a crazy dog, good careers, great family/friends and a cozy home. Not bad for 10 years!
So to The Hubs, here’s to the next 10 years and all that comes with it. I love you and I DO every day!
Now it’s your turn to share. What words of marriage wisdom do you have?
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